Jan 21, 2014


 I was raised by my Grandmother. She was outspoken, she was fiery and she was stubborn. With all these qualities she was still the old fashioned, dinner from scratch every night, act like a lady, keep a clean house, have some pride woman, she is a character to say the least. One thing she told me was "Be quiet when adults are speaking". As an impressionable young girl, this could raise some issues as I got older. For one, it put me under the impression that what I had to say, what I thought and how I felt didn't need to be voiced to authoritative figures, this soon included peers. Fast forward through life and I'm in my early 20's not knowing how to say speak my mind and feeling as though if I did, it wasn't important.

I started failing in all areas of communication. Looking back at it, it's weird as hell to not feel free enough in spaces that I can speak my mind and it be heard. I still to this day go out and I'm labeled "the quiet one", I'm far from quiet, I just don't see every platform as a safe place to express myself. Everyone is so cautious and hesitant to speak their mind that a lot goes unsaid, but what are we afraid of? Being judged, offending, or coming across wrong, most importantly rejection. There seems to be less and less open spaces to safely communicate our thoughts, feelings and ideas of not only ourselves but each other.

Jan 15, 2014

Femme Fatale

Nothing screams confidence more than a woman who is unafraid to be herself. We see these women all the time, at the hair salon, in the club and even at the coffee shop. I used to have the lowest self confidence, it hung over my head, casting shadows of self doubt. I was scared to step out, scared to be great and completely complacent. That was not the life for me. I decided I wanted to be who I was meant to be, fully and unapologetic in my body. In the path towards that, I started believing in myself a lot more. Carrying myself with a sense of purpose, confidence and working harder towards goals. Once I started investing more time into changing my life and focusing on improvements, I started feeling a lot better about myself. Who cares how great you are if you don't even step into it and own it? Stop being so hard on yourself and actually challenge yourself to do better in all aspects and watch yourself flourish.

My confidence comes from my abilities, my talents, the love I have for myself and believing that I can do anything. I don't compare myself to anyone else because no one will ever be quite like me.It's your life and you get to set the tone. Surround yourself with people who make you happy, people who encourage you to be the best version of you. Because of this, I've created an amazing support system, an unfaltering self love and a huge sense of self worth that is priceless and irreplaceable.

Jan 8, 2014

No Cut Cards

2013 was an interesting year for me, it had a lot of ups and downs, at times it felt like a roller coaster. It shined a light on what I'd like to do with my life and gave me a sense of purpose that I'm extremely grateful for. I took a long break from writing in order to focus on other things, and I'm happy to say that I'm now writing in a few areas of my life, expressing my imagination, making sure my voice is heard and analyzing daily emotions. And with writing comes blogging. Blogging became so much of a chore for me, and I won't do anything I don't like because I don't like forced interactions or watered down interactions. If people are actually going to take the time out to see what I have to say, I want to make sure that in not being lazy about stating my point or just talking because words are there, that's not the mark I'd like to leave. So here I am, with a New Year goal to provide a more uncensored, potent version of me and my thoughts.

May 20, 2013

DIY Extreme Destroyed Jeans

This weekend I destroyed another pair of denim jeans. Ever since that mishap in '11 I have successfully destroyed numerous pairs of denim. This time I decided to do a more destroyed design. This called for my favorite light wash, high waist old school levi's, since they were my favorite I was determined to get them right. I like to use old school heavy denim, not spandex blends for my DIY projects.

Here are the Steps below to help you create this look with your denim:

1) Connect denim at the seams, creasing them.

 2) Cut horizontally across the crease, starting at the top and working towards the bottom. For this pair I started with larger cuts then decreased as I went down the legs.

*The ripped effect occurs naturally during the bleaching/washer/dryer process.

3) After I knotted the pant legs, I dipped them in a blean solution of 1 part bleach, 2 parts water. Knotting the pants adds to the destroyed/bleach look, making it appear more tie-dyed.

4) I let the denim soak for about 10 minutes then run them out in a laundry sink, then washed them twice by themselves. Once to remove the bleach, and a second time for the smell.

5) Afterwards I placed them in a dryer.

Pants are now ready to wear, here are the results:

Good Girl, Bad Skin

These past few weeks my skin has been looking like the Dark Side of The Moon. I've tried everything from Benzonite Clay Masks to my usual African Black Soap. NOTHING was making a difference. I was almost ready to throw in the towel on this one. I didn't know if it was stress, pre-period pimples or what bu something HAD to give. I was prepared to spend big coin on some random get-clear-quick scheme until it dawned on me, I'm using great all natural products. These products have worked for me and I have sworn by them for years, why do I need to switch up the formula now? So I didn't, I just switched up my battle plan and started washing my face in the shower.

Why the shower? 

The shower offers a lot of steam if you turn the temperature high enough, steam is known for opening up pores. Once I was sure that my pores were open (about 10 minutes of thorough body washing at high temperatures) I used the black soap to clean out my now opened pores. The next morning, I noticed a huge difference in my skin- I love immediate results! If you don't like to steam in the shower, you can purchase a face steamer, or place a hot towel on your face to help open up your pores. The main idea is to get those pores open and clean them OUT. I'll repeat this method for the next 2-3 showers in order to rid my skin of blackheads and prevent future breakouts. To take your steam cleanse up a level, add exfoliation to your regimen. Shower exfoliation is best for loosening up dirt and blackheads. Happy cleansing ladies!

May 17, 2013

Accepting Sensuality.

Does my sexiness upset you? Does it come as a surprise That I dance like I've got diamonds At the meeting of my thighs? - Maya Angelou 

I've been battling back and forth with owning my sensuality on a higher level. It's so subtle, you have to pay close attention or you'll miss the whole ordeal. Sometimes I envy women who can carry their sensuality outside of the bedroom. To be undeniably and unapologetic about my sensual self, embracing myself. Then I thought about it, as long as I tap into my power and sensuality, why does it matter who sees it? I am a firm believer in body worship and I do so in the privacy of my own home. My sensuality goes beyond my body's curves and resides in my eyes and is reborn everytime I smile. I own that. I am that. It's a form of self love that require a personal intimacy that not everyone is invited to.

May 16, 2013

No Mo' Fro

I cut all my hair off. Liberating. The millions of things that I had to do just to prep my hair no longer exists and I'm more than ready for the summer and not having to deal with hair. With that being said, I will most likely not be blogging about natural hair anymore. It is BORING. Three years and a half years into blogging, I think I may have said everything there is to say about natural hair concerning me. I want to blog about, whatever and not feel like I have to meet some expectations. Blogging about natural hair really took the fun out of blogging for me, and I've been blogging since Xanga. So I guess this is to say I'm back to blogging about what I feel is important, ranting about what I feel like, and posting whatever tickles my fancy. I'm no longer the girl with the fro, blogging about fros.